WRITING AN ONLINE DATING PROFILE

You're About to Be Amazed at How Easy Writing an Online Dating Profile Can Be!

Don't know what to say or where to begin? WRITING AN ONLINE DATING PROFILE doesn't have to be daunting. This is your opportunity to speak in your own voice, and helps people envision what it would be like to have a conversation with you.

The written portion of your profile should contain a description of who you are, what you seek in a companion, and what you want out of a relationship. Keep it to 2-3 paragraphs totaling 300-400 words. Writing an online dating profile that is confident and clear will increase your chances of attracting a compatible match.

TIPS TO GET YOU ORGANIZED:

writing a dating profile

Before you begin writing your online dating profile, here are some tips to help you get organized and prepared for what you want to say:

TIP 1:

Use a word-processing program such as Microsoft Word or Apple Pages when you're writing an online dating profile. There are several very good reasons for this.

  • You're typing out your dating profile description and just as you reach the end, the site goes down. You've just lost your masterpiece and can't recreate it word for word (been there, done that).

  • If you plan to use several sites, you can copy and paste from your computer and save lots of time. This is also useful whenever you make updates to your online profile.

  • These programs have excellent spelling and grammar check tools - use them! Even the most intelligent or humorous profiles can be sabotaged when it's full of mistakes.

  • As I stated above, the written portion should be around 400 words at most. The first portion should describe you in 200-250 words. The second portion should describe your ideal mate and relationship in 100-150 words. You can always use the word count feature to see how close you got.

TIP 2:

Have available the list of personality traits, interests and physical features you put together when deciding on a USERNAME. These are handy memory triggers for writing an online dating profile description. Select the ones you'd most like to write about.

TIP 3:

Jot down what you enjoy most about the career you have chosen, and how it makes you feel. Do the same for any volunteer work you may have done.

TIP 4:

Get together with friends and ask them to tell you what they feel your best qualities are and why. Make note of what they say.

TIP 5:

Get yourself into a positive frame of mind. If you're having a bad day, it's not a good time to be writing an online dating profile - put this off till you're in a better mood.

TIP 6:

Be honest! You won't be able to disguise the truth of who you are once you meet someone face to face.

TIP 7:

When you completed writing your online dating profile, ask a friend to proofread it and provide feedback.

WRITE A STAND OUT DESCRIPTION

writing a dating profile

So, how do you go about writing an online dating profile description that stands out from the rest?


Be Conversational

Writing an online dating profile description should read like you're inviting the reader to have a conversation with you. You want to describe yourself with enthusiasm, optimism or humor - you don't just want to give a report of who you are.

INSTEAD OF SAYING...

I enjoy movies


SAY...

I have the "Ultimate Planet Earth Collection" - it would be fun to watch again with the right partner

I like baking

I make the best organic brownies on the planet!

Demonstrate Who You Are

Don't be apologetic and be honest! Don't just list your adjectives, demonstrate them. People won't connect with what you have to say if it reads like a list of historical facts. Try writing an online dating profile that's colorful but truthful.

INSTEAD OF SAYING...

I'm a pretty happy person


SAY...

Life's so good I can't stop smiling

Friends would say I'm intelligent

I could chew your ear off in any of four languages about the theory of evolution but I'd rather nibble on it

I love doing volunteer work

I feel profoundly fulfilled whenever I volunteer my time at the retired racehorse sanctuary

AFRAID OF THE TRUTH...

TURN THEM INTO POSITIVES...

If your weight concerns you

I'm a BBW (Big Beautiful Woman) and proud of it

If your height concerns you

This one is for the men - With me you will feel safe. My heart and body are here for your protection

Don't Be Like Everyone Else

You want to write an online dating profile that stands out and doesn't read like everyone else's.

INSTEAD OF SAYING...


SAY...

I like to snuggle with a woman in front of the fire with a glass of wine

I'd love to slow dance with you in front of roaring fire to "Dancing in the Dark" by Diana Krall

My children mean everything to me

This one is for the women - best to say little or nothing about your children. It makes men run!!! Of course they mean everything to you but save this till after you start dating and are sure he isn't going to take a fast exit.

Reveal Your "Deal Breakers" Politely

We all have needs we just can't compromise on and that's perfectly acceptable. When writing an online dating profile, be sure these are well stated. You don't want to find yourself having to prepare a dinner for a staunch omnivore if you're a life-long vegan.

INSTEAD OF SAYING...


SAY...

If you spend every Sunday attending Mass, you're probably not the right partner for me

I'm a spiritual person who doesn't believe in organized religion and am looking for a partner who feels the same

If you own cats, this would be a problem

I have stock in Kleenex because I can't get within five feet of a cat without sneezing non-stop

Write For Your Target Audience

It's okay to discourage certain types from contacting you when writing an online dating profile, but be careful with your wording. You don't want to discourage potentially good matches by sounding inflexible.

INSTEAD OF SAYING...


SAY...

I want to be with someone who loves sailing as much as I do

Sailing is my first love, but if hiking the Appalachian Trail is your passion, I'm up for the challenge

And most of all - be honest about the kind of relationship you're looking for. If it's a casual relationship you want, say so! It's deceptive to lure in more respondents by talking about a long term relationship or marriage when they're not on your radar screen.

Choose Your Words Carefully

Writing an online dating profile that includes sexual innuendos, cliches, and words that can make you sound insecure, desperate, needy or negative will not give you good results. This is not the time to efface yourself, bash the opposite sex, reveal your woes, or describe what you DON'T want.

DON'T SAY...

THE IMPLICATION IS...

Life would be so much better with you in it

You're desperate and lonely

I want someone who is financially stable

You're looking for someone to support you

I've been hurt - game players need not apply

There are barriers around you too challenging for anyone to break through

Your photo is a turn on

Your only interest is a sexual encounter. If that's all you do want - fine. But if it's a relationship you're hoping for this approach won't do it.

DESCRIBE YOUR IDEAL PARTNER AND RELATIONSHIP

I know a couple who met online. He lived in New York, she lived in California. When writing her profile description, she made sure to include all 30 attributes she wanted in both a man and in a relationship. In his profile he had only one item on the list - she should have dark, curly hair. They now live in California and have been happily married for seven years.

Now that's a pretty extreme example. She had too many, and he had only one. Listing too many requirements may intimidate likely matches from connecting with you. Listing only one requirement may leave some with the impression that you're not seriously looking. You need to balance these two opposite approaches when writing an online dating profile so that you're eliciting enough respondents. Getting one email a month can be very discouraging while getting 10 a night is tedious.

Of course you're going to have your top priorities for a match, but you want to focus on those particular qualities in someone that brings out the best in YOU. Following are a couple of great well written online dating profiles:

Man looking for a woman:

writing a dating profile

You can make me smile even when you're not with me. You can be passionate and spontaneous. You would look great coming out of a Jeannie's bottle and know what my three wishes would be. You can love deeply and be loved. You don't live in the past and expect the best of the future.

Woman looking for a man:

woman with a man in mind

Somewhere out there is a great guy who will not only want to introduce me to new things, but will also like to try some adventures that are new to both of us. He will not only put up with my wacky moods, but he may even think they're cute, (even if he won't admit it). The man I would like to meet is confident and self assured, but isn't cocky with an over inflated ego.

Try to be flexible on your requirements for physical features. Chemistry is difficult to orchestrate. You could start out dating a Pierce Brosnan look alike but by the third date his personality morphs him into Quasimoto. The opposite is also true. A seemingly plain Jane turns into Miss Universe because her personality and sense of humor puts you over the moon.

In conclusion, don't get hung up on writing the perfect profile. You'll run the risk of writing an online dating profile that remains in permanent edit mode and never gets published. You can always go back and finesse it. Revising your profile from time to time is a good thing to do for two very good reasons:

  1. Online profiles that remain unchanged or untouched descend lower and lower in the search listing as new profiles appear.

    TIP: Every time that you update your profile, the site's engine will place your profile somewhere back at the top of the search listings!

  2. It's always a good idea to share new things about you. Perhaps you just returned from the most adventurous trip you've ever taken, or discovered you have a talent you didn't know you had - don't hide it, share it! This is a good time to go back and rewrite your online profile.

Say something original and inviting in your closing sentence. "Thanks for reading my profile - Cheers" is polite but shows little imagination. This would be better -

"If anything I've stated resonates with you, let's connect and take it from there."

dating profile

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