Do You Want to Get Positive Results When You Flirt? Learn How to Interpret Flirting Signals and You'll See How Easy it Is!

Flirting is universal - it is a societal norm no matter what culture or what part of the world you are in. Just about every adult flirts - whether out of romantic interest or for the occasional ego boost, it is a natural part of how humans behave. And, because we've become technology oriented, we're even flirting through our computers.

flirting, art of flirting

According to anthropology and social science studies, flirting is not only a basic instinct, it is an essential part of human interaction. Why - because flirting is a critical component to the mating cycle.

For some of us, flirting comes naturally, even effortlessly. These flirts know just when to flash that smile, make appropriate eye contact or go in for the 'close' without stumbling over their words.

For others, the subtle cues of flirting are about as easy to spot as a polar bear in a snow storm. There are unwritten rules of flirting etiquette - learn to decipher flirting signals before getting out into the dating world and master the techniques in advance.


Studies of gender differences indicate that women flirt to show their interest, elevate a relationship or just have fun. Men's flirting signals are more motivated by their sexual desires but will also flirt to show how strong they are and that they are the right partner for breeding.

We use different parts of our anatomy to flirt, along with certain behaviors that have become relatively identifiable. The following flirting signals will help you spot those subtle cues.

flirting, eye contact

Gazing into one's eyes is an emotionally charged act - particularly if it's prolonged. It could be an expression of intense love or on the other extreme, intense hate. When flirting, we tend to limit eye contact to brief glances.

facial expressions, flirting signs

A man will briefly raise his eyebrows when he spots a woman that has caught his attention. A woman will likely flash a smile when she's interested.

Once you've initiated contact look for expressions of amusement, agreement, fascination, etc., as you carry on your flirtation, for indication that there is continued interest.

flirt, flirting hints

When a person is oriented toward you and leaning forward that's a sign they're interested. If the other party is mimicking your behavior, the interest is being reciprocated. Another sign to look for is that the arms are comfortably loose.

touching, flirting

A touch is one of the most powerful flirting signals because it can either boost the relationship or stop it in its tracks. If all the other signs have been positive, a touch done appropriately such as brushing the arm will likely be welcomed.

flirting body language, signs of flirting

We're all protective of the area around us we call personal space. We generally don't want anyone we barely know to get too close. This barrier comes down a bit when we're flirting. The closer a person gets to you without physically touching you, the more they are showing interest in you.

You can show you're receptive by also moving in a bit closer. You can do this by leaning in to hear what they are saying. Or, if you're side by side, reorient your body so you're face to face.


Want to know if your party is interested? These flirting signals will help you identify the different cues that men and women give when they are romantically interested someone. It is equally as important to know when someone is not interested so you don't place yourself and the other party in an uncomfortable position.

Flirting Signals that Indicate Interest:

man flirting, tips on flirting
  • He raises his eyebrows upon first glance

  • He winks

  • He'll puff out his chest

  • He struts when he walks

  • He'll lean in closer to hear you

  • He leans back in his chair

  • He slowly begins to invade your personal space
  • He's likely to start the conversation

woman flirting, female flirting
  • She makes eye contact and holds it long enough to get a male's attention

  • She bats her eyelashes

  • She draws attention to her lips

  • She plays with her hair

  • She'll lean her head to expose her neck

  • She'll rub the rim of her glass with her finger

  • She'll lightly touch a man on the arm

Responses to Flirting Signals that Indicate Disinterest:

tips on flirting, nonverbal flirting

Whether you're flirting for romance or for no intended outcome you need to pay attention to the cues that are telling you "thanks but no thanks".

  • If your target looks away or avoids making eye contact with you, more than likely they are disinterested.

  • If you move in close and the other party steps back a bit, your chances are slim in advancing further.

  • Check for signs in their body language such as folded arms, tightly crossed legs or rubbing the back of the neck. These are signs of dislike.

  • You don't have your target's full attention when only the head is turned towards you but the rest of the body is facing another direction.

  • You know your party is bored by your flirting signals when they support their head with one hand.

  • If they're clasping their hands or rubbing their palms, it's an indication that they are feeling anxious.

  • Smiling - does it look constrained, given at inappropriate moments during the conversation or fixed for a bit too long?

  • A lack of facial expressions to what you're saying can be interpreted as a disinterest.

  • Avoid overt or imposing touches. This is a turn-off to both sexes.

Now that I've armed you with how to interpret the subtle and not so subtle flirting signals, I hope I've given you the confidence to go forth and get that date!

signs of flirting, flirting signs

One of the best parts of growing older - you can flirt all you like since you've become harmless. ~Liz Smith

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